I don't usually reflect upon years past. I am a very impatient person, always have been, and I much prefer to think of what lies ahead. I much prefer to think about what I need to do rather than what I've done.
But this year is a little different. This year, I accomplished something I've been meaning to do my entire life: write a novel. I'm really proud of it- even as it soaks in its own filth right now and I attempt to clean and polish what I can. I learned a lot about myself as a writer. Now I know that when I sit down to write something, no matter how many distractions there are in life, I can do it. And now that I've done it once, I can do it again. And I will.
But I'm not going to sit in the past for much longer. There is an edit to complete. A new novel to start. The search begins for an agent, for an editor, for a publisher. And if I send my novel out into the ether and it never finds a home (a distinct possibility that scares me every day) I will find a way to self-publish it, or podcast an audio book, or whatever I can do to use the technology I'm learning more about every day to make things happen for myself.
Thanks to all my family and friends for supporting me on this writing journey. And to all the people I don't quite know who read this blog. I hope you don't lurk too much so we can support and encourage one another to accomplish all of our goals (writing goals or otherwise).
Always looking forward...
M.
Thursday, December 31, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
Darling I Don't Know Why I Go To Extremes
Last night, I had a dream that I wrote a blog post and it was titled after the Billy Joel song lyric Darling I don't know why I go to extremes...
Which extreme?
It reminded me of a dream I had a few weeks ago. I dreamt that the title of my novel was: Wrap Around.
Yeah folks. 76,000 words and an entire year of blood, sweat, and tears and that's all a little rapid eye movement could come up with.
I consider this the worst decision my subconscious has ever made. It's absolutely terrible. Wrap Around? What does it even mean? All I can think of is when you select the 'wrap text' option on an excel spreadsheet. And excel spreadsheets remind me of 9-5 jobs in dirty, grey cubicles with fluorescent lighting. And memos. And casual Fridays.
But the subconscious has a way of being tricky so I thought I would humour it this time around and start with a blog title, then create a little content to go along with it. Which is the opposite (the extreme if you will) of writing an entire novel and trying to sum it up in one title.
So, how do you deal with titles?
1. Do you start with an idea and a title in mind, then write the book?
2. Or write the book and then create a title that fits it?
Which extreme?
I'm currently dealing with #2 and, I gotta, tell you, #1 is lookin' pretty good in retrospect.
I mean...Wrap Around. Seriously?!
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Yay!
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!
May your days be filled with lots of delicious food (I will be feasting on the 7 fishes as the fat Italians do on Christmas Eve), love, warmth, happiness, and...for all you writers out there...new stories to tell.
Monday, December 21, 2009
The Day I Met The Pioneer Woman
I realize I'm a bit late on updating about my meeting with Ree Drummond (The Pioneer Woman). And I certainly apologize. Because I know you were losing sleep over it. You can rub your tired eyes.
I met the Pioneer Woman.
She was nice.
She was pretty.
She was funny.
She signed my cookbook.
It was nice.
That was my 3rd grade rendition of it. My adult rendition of it goes a little something like this:
Borders required a bracelet to attend the signing- which I didn't know about until late in the game. As soon as I found out, I started panicking, then sent wild, frantic e-mails to my friend Jess (whose entire future happiness depended on my meeting the Pioneer Woman...which I'll expand upon later). I'm not really sure how it happened, but I managed to leave work in about 5 seconds flat, get from Chelsea to Columbus Circle, get a bracelet, and return to work in about 30 minutes time, which, frankly, is unheard of in this city. I consider myself a superhero for this feat.
I got to Borders about an hour and 15 minutes before the signing because, let's face it, my entire future happiness depended on meeting the Pioneer Woman as well.
The Border's people were very strict. They required me to sit in a certain place and then they proceeded to ask me the correct spelling of my name and write it on a post-it with a sharpie. I was told that I must put the post-it on the title page and when I put it on the page with a picture, an impatient hand from above shot down into my book and immediately placed it on the opposite page to the tune of a loud, scolding sigh. At that point I became scared and sat quietly in my seat.
An hour and a half later, after lamenting that I didn't have any friends (there were so many groups of girlfriends there laughing and having fun!) and re-playing the traumatic post-it ordeal , Ree Drummond came out and answered lots of questions. She was incredibly sweet, well-spoken, and very funny. It was a lovely experience. I wish I could tell you what people asked, but I was in awe and only remembered something about her wanting sushi, her hoping she didn't mess her kids up by homeschooling, and her husband being very supportive of her blog.
At that point, the Border's people began running around with their headsets and they made us sit quietly then get up row by row to meet Ree. I think one woman was hit with a night stick when her un-braceleted friend tried to get in line to take her picture (I'm telling you, these Borders people were scary!). I was surprisingly nervous because I wanted Ree to like me. Which is silly. But that's how I felt. And my mother tells me to embrace my feelings.
Soon, it was my turn. I'm not really sure what happened at that point. She signed my book and I think I said I was excited to meet her and that I enjoyed her blog. More likely it came out something like this: I. Melissa. You. Pioneer Woman. Hi. Which is really quite stupid because the post-it had my name.
Then I proceeded to babble incessantly. Because my friend Jess and I had prepared a portfolio of sorts. A portfolio to set up Jess with Cowboy Josh who works on the Pioneer Woman's ranch and is apparently willing to be set up through the Pioneer Woman's blog. I truly believe that Jess would get along swimmingly well with this man that I have never met, based solely on the fact that Jess likes tall, skinny men, who are rugged and have intense gazes. It was a 'Top Ten List of Reasons My Friend Jess Should Meet Cowboy Josh.' I presented the portfolio to Ree Drummond and she said she would pass it along to Cowboy Josh. I think I told her to read it 'in her travels'. If someone could tell me what that means, I would appreciate it. I also said something about waking up at 4am and that was crazy. Which I realize is insulting to a woman who wakes up at 4am every day to work on a ranch. I had a serious case of verbal diarrhea.
Then, I forgot to get a picture, despite the fact that Tyler was standing there with a camera the entire time waiting for that very moment. When my face fell, a very nice woman noticed. She was holding a camera. She was a very soft-spoken, smart-looking young woman. I soon found out she was Ree's editor (after another embarrassing chapter of 'The Babbling Chronicles' starring Melissa).
I managed to get a picture because her editor was nice enough to interrupt things. I vaguely recall the Pioneer Woman saying she was 'glad I came back' which I appreciated very much since I felt bad to interrupt the flow of the signing.
Overall, it was great! I presented the portfolio for Jess. I got my cookbook signed. And I met my favorite blogger! I also learned that she is publishing, Black Heels to Tractor Wheels (a series from her blog) which is exciting! Maybe our novels will get published at the same time and we can go on a book trip together (excuse me while I go laugh at myself for even uttering that.)
This is the Pioneer Woman looking so lovely (please excuse how dark this photo is.)
This is the Pioneer Woman thinking I am crazy after I handed her the portfolio. She looks amused...but frightened.
The Pioneer Woman: So what is this? A resume?
Melissa: More like a top ten...[incessant babbling]...Read it in your travels...[incessant babbling]...
The Pioneer Woman: Where does your friend live?
Melissa: Boston...[incessant babbling]...she wanted to meet you tomorrow in person but she was driving here...and...and...she would have to wake up at 4am which is crazy...[incessant babbling]...
The Pioneer Woman (beautiful, sweet, polite, well-spoken Pioneer Woman): Well, I will certainly pass this along to Cowboy Josh.
This is the Pioneer Woman wondering why I came back for a picture and probably looking for security.
I met the Pioneer Woman.
She was nice.
She was pretty.
She was funny.
She signed my cookbook.
It was nice.
That was my 3rd grade rendition of it. My adult rendition of it goes a little something like this:
Borders required a bracelet to attend the signing- which I didn't know about until late in the game. As soon as I found out, I started panicking, then sent wild, frantic e-mails to my friend Jess (whose entire future happiness depended on my meeting the Pioneer Woman...which I'll expand upon later). I'm not really sure how it happened, but I managed to leave work in about 5 seconds flat, get from Chelsea to Columbus Circle, get a bracelet, and return to work in about 30 minutes time, which, frankly, is unheard of in this city. I consider myself a superhero for this feat.
I got to Borders about an hour and 15 minutes before the signing because, let's face it, my entire future happiness depended on meeting the Pioneer Woman as well.
The Border's people were very strict. They required me to sit in a certain place and then they proceeded to ask me the correct spelling of my name and write it on a post-it with a sharpie. I was told that I must put the post-it on the title page and when I put it on the page with a picture, an impatient hand from above shot down into my book and immediately placed it on the opposite page to the tune of a loud, scolding sigh. At that point I became scared and sat quietly in my seat.
An hour and a half later, after lamenting that I didn't have any friends (there were so many groups of girlfriends there laughing and having fun!) and re-playing the traumatic post-it ordeal , Ree Drummond came out and answered lots of questions. She was incredibly sweet, well-spoken, and very funny. It was a lovely experience. I wish I could tell you what people asked, but I was in awe and only remembered something about her wanting sushi, her hoping she didn't mess her kids up by homeschooling, and her husband being very supportive of her blog.
At that point, the Border's people began running around with their headsets and they made us sit quietly then get up row by row to meet Ree. I think one woman was hit with a night stick when her un-braceleted friend tried to get in line to take her picture (I'm telling you, these Borders people were scary!). I was surprisingly nervous because I wanted Ree to like me. Which is silly. But that's how I felt. And my mother tells me to embrace my feelings.
Soon, it was my turn. I'm not really sure what happened at that point. She signed my book and I think I said I was excited to meet her and that I enjoyed her blog. More likely it came out something like this: I. Melissa. You. Pioneer Woman. Hi. Which is really quite stupid because the post-it had my name.
Then I proceeded to babble incessantly. Because my friend Jess and I had prepared a portfolio of sorts. A portfolio to set up Jess with Cowboy Josh who works on the Pioneer Woman's ranch and is apparently willing to be set up through the Pioneer Woman's blog. I truly believe that Jess would get along swimmingly well with this man that I have never met, based solely on the fact that Jess likes tall, skinny men, who are rugged and have intense gazes. It was a 'Top Ten List of Reasons My Friend Jess Should Meet Cowboy Josh.' I presented the portfolio to Ree Drummond and she said she would pass it along to Cowboy Josh. I think I told her to read it 'in her travels'. If someone could tell me what that means, I would appreciate it. I also said something about waking up at 4am and that was crazy. Which I realize is insulting to a woman who wakes up at 4am every day to work on a ranch. I had a serious case of verbal diarrhea.
Then, I forgot to get a picture, despite the fact that Tyler was standing there with a camera the entire time waiting for that very moment. When my face fell, a very nice woman noticed. She was holding a camera. She was a very soft-spoken, smart-looking young woman. I soon found out she was Ree's editor (after another embarrassing chapter of 'The Babbling Chronicles' starring Melissa).
I managed to get a picture because her editor was nice enough to interrupt things. I vaguely recall the Pioneer Woman saying she was 'glad I came back' which I appreciated very much since I felt bad to interrupt the flow of the signing.
Overall, it was great! I presented the portfolio for Jess. I got my cookbook signed. And I met my favorite blogger! I also learned that she is publishing, Black Heels to Tractor Wheels (a series from her blog) which is exciting! Maybe our novels will get published at the same time and we can go on a book trip together (excuse me while I go laugh at myself for even uttering that.)
This is the Pioneer Woman looking so lovely (please excuse how dark this photo is.)
This is the Pioneer Woman thinking I am crazy after I handed her the portfolio. She looks amused...but frightened.
The Pioneer Woman: So what is this? A resume?
Melissa: More like a top ten...[incessant babbling]...Read it in your travels...[incessant babbling]...
The Pioneer Woman: Where does your friend live?
Melissa: Boston...[incessant babbling]...she wanted to meet you tomorrow in person but she was driving here...and...and...she would have to wake up at 4am which is crazy...[incessant babbling]...
The Pioneer Woman (beautiful, sweet, polite, well-spoken Pioneer Woman): Well, I will certainly pass this along to Cowboy Josh.
This is the Pioneer Woman wondering why I came back for a picture and probably looking for security.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Biking Memory
Now that the frost is nipping at people's noses and it's dark and dreary at 4pm, it has become impossible to do one of my favorite things. Bike. Every year I come to this point, constantly checking weather.com hoping that there's a weekend day above 40 degrees (that's my biking temperature cut-off). It doesn't happen often and when it does, I still battle cold winds and numb cheeks, and I find it difficult (and sometimes painful!) to do the long bike rides Tyler and I so desperately enjoy. This year, due to busy and/or rainy weekends this fall, my biking season ended much earlier than it should have. Now I find myself even more restless than usual as the cold weather drops in and overstays it's welcome.
Every once and a while I like to nestle in a memory. Today of course my mind wanders to days of biking...
Before our annual block party, all the kids that lived on the same tiny street of my childhood home participated in a strange ritual. It took place in the morning, as our parents dragged out patio tables and chairs to the street, set up the bbq and placed toys on the lawn. We all hopped on our banana seat bicycles and proceeded to line up and ride in a tight circle. Around and around, over and over again, in a swirling, dizzying, wonderful circle. I remember how important it was that we participate in this ritual year after year on that special day. A day we looked forward to all summer. It's a blurry memory and I really only envision the dizzy, grey concrete underneath my bicycle tire. But I love that memory. And I always wonder when we broke away from the circle, one by one, and parted ways.
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Revision Day 1
Ok, so I forgot that yesterday was our office holiday party and, therefore, I did not begin my edit as planned. I begin today, after spin class.
Despite my minor freak-out session on Monday, I do have a revision plan and one I think might actually work for me.
I am going to read the darn thing from start to finish, making notes as I go. I am going to break down my draft into scenes and, because I enjoy speaking back and forth to my 3rd person self, I am going to ask questions:
1. Why does this scene belong in the book?
2. What is it trying to accomplish?
3. Does it accomplish it?
Every time I introduce a character, I am going to make sure this character lives up to the Owen Meany First Sentence.
Once I finish all of this, I hope to have a better idea of the arc of the story and how to make it work better.
Then I shall prepare a list of To Do's. There will be many, that I can assure you.
I'm rather excited about this whole 'revision' thing. How different it is from sitting down to a very white, very blank first page.
Despite my minor freak-out session on Monday, I do have a revision plan and one I think might actually work for me.
I am going to read the darn thing from start to finish, making notes as I go. I am going to break down my draft into scenes and, because I enjoy speaking back and forth to my 3rd person self, I am going to ask questions:
1. Why does this scene belong in the book?
2. What is it trying to accomplish?
3. Does it accomplish it?
Every time I introduce a character, I am going to make sure this character lives up to the Owen Meany First Sentence.
Once I finish all of this, I hope to have a better idea of the arc of the story and how to make it work better.
Then I shall prepare a list of To Do's. There will be many, that I can assure you.
I'm rather excited about this whole 'revision' thing. How different it is from sitting down to a very white, very blank first page.
Monday, December 14, 2009
Why did you eat the Flan?
Tomorrow I begin what I fondly call: 'the dreaded edit'.
I could go on. But I won't. Because I've already started speaking back and forth to myself in 3rd person and it's only going to get worse from there.
I took one month off from the novel and spent my time being French for a week, then eating a lot of cheese, going to spin class and watching people die on Grey's Anatomy. It's been fun!
But now it's time to get back into the weeds and follow all of Tim Gunn's marvelous advice to 'make it work' so I don't get 'auf'ed by a tall, blond, literary agent wearing lederhosen. (Wait. What?)
But now it's time to get back into the weeds and follow all of Tim Gunn's marvelous advice to 'make it work' so I don't get 'auf'ed by a tall, blond, literary agent wearing lederhosen. (Wait. What?)
Problem is, I don't exactly know what I'm doing and it's making me slightly nauseous. I just opened the document for the first time in 30 days and I literally wanted to puke. (I'm sure this has nothing to do with the 5 pounds of chorizo I just consumed at our office holiday lunch.)
A lot of things started running through my head:
Melissa! You don't even have real chapters! (I write scene by scene and I don't know how to slap numbers on them.)
Melissa! You don't even have a title! (Seriously, I can't even think of one. Can you pitch a book called 'Untitled'?)
Melissa! One of your characters has supposedly been dead for 20 years and he's in the first 3 alleged 'chapters' of your book. (I'm sorry! I didn't even know he was dead until 250 pages in.)
I could go on. But I won't. Because I've already started speaking back and forth to myself in 3rd person and it's only going to get worse from there.
Melissa! Why did you eat that flan today at lunch?! (I don't know. I just don't know.)
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